Alive!

Dear Larry the -- Wait a second.

Whoa.

.. I mean.. Whoa.

You're not there, are you? .. I mean. A hear a faint little groan from deep inside my head, but for the most part, you're not there. Holy shit, guys. Larry is nearly gone. Its been a while, and lemme tell you, a LOT has happened. I know I've been super bad about keeping up with my blog, but still. No excuses. .. I just got super lazy. So, here's what you've missed:

On March 24th, I went in for my surgery. I was fashionably late by a half hour, because.. .. ya know. Surgery looming over your head tends to make you wanna move a touch slower than you normally would... and lets just be honest here, it was 4 in the morning and I was flipping tired. Anyway. I got there.. and everything seemed to just happen in a flash. One second I'm in the waiting room, just paid an ENORMOUS co-pay, and the next I'm in a hospital gown with a swarm of people around me. I was being poked for blood, asked questions by three different people, getting my blood pressure done, and trying to say good-bye to my mom and girlfriend. The ENT ( ears, nose and throat) Doctor came in and shook my hand. He was a tall chap, and funny. He was asking me if I was ready, which I just sort of stared at him blankly.. sorta like this:

He smiled and went on to inform me that he hadn't had his morning coffee and that he was up all night drinking, so he wasn't ready either. .. He was joking. I hope. I mean.. .. He was. Right. Yeah, we're all good here. Anyway. I was wheeled back, my girlfriend and mom tagging a long behind me. Talking somewhat until we came to a fork in the road, so to speak. We went one way, my mom and girlfriend went another. When we rolled through the doors of the operating room, I remember it was so white. There were a lot more people in there than I was anticipating, and they were all busy doing something. One nurse was checking fluids, another guy was looking at a 3d map of my head ( which was UBER weird to see), another two were helping me get moved to the table. The main nurse said " I'm about to be your favorite forever" then placed a warm blanket over my body, which felt so amazing. The anesthesiologist was hover around me and said " we will start when my partner comes in." Two seconds later, he was there. She said " we're going to let you go under now" and I nodded and said okay. She said " You're going to feel warm and then that will be it." I nodded again. There was a warmth, and my eyes felt so heavy. The warmth spread to my limbs and that was it. The last thing I saw was the lights above my head.

I woke up to another swarm of people, a couple saying my name and something about moving to another table. I was in a different room and they were pulling me to lay on a catscan table. I helped as much as I could, but mostly was dead weight making things harder. I remember a guy from the CAT Scan saying good luck to me. Then I remember being in recovery in ICU. There was this amazing nurse there that stayed real close. She informed me that they stopped the surgery after getting through the bone they drilled through. Dr. Aldrich wanted to make sure his measurements were 100%.  That I'd have to do this again. I was sad, but I was also really thirsty and she was holding ice chips. I ate a couple and drifted in and out of awake and sleepy-sleepy time. Jo and my Mom finally came back and they both held my hand. They asked if I knew and I nodded. They said that Dr. Aldrich came out and said that he stopped because he wanted to be sure. A resident came and talked to us and said that in the OR Dr. Aldrich stopped and said " If this was my daughter, I would want me to stop now."  and that's that they did. I thank him, from the bottom of my heart, for that.

Next was ICU room, where I slept off the groggy-ness for the next couple of days. I sorta looked like this:

But, honestly. This is what I looked like:  

The circles on my head are from these little stickies they put on my head to help map out where their 'gps' was. .. And let me tell you, that was hard to get off! I wasn't in a whole lot of pain, but my shoulder really, really hurt from the position they had me in. I couldn't breathe because I was all stuffy, and it hurt to talk. But, the pain itself wasn't that bad. They brought me food once I was set up in my room, which I tried to eat. But, promptly threw up all over my self. Thank god my mom and girlfriend was there and cleaned my up rather quickly. I chewed on a little bread and chewed on some ice, but eventually, just went back to sleep. 

I was bouncing back within 24 hours. My best friend came and saw me, and Jo never left my side. Many doctors came and went, and talked to me about what happened and how I was feeling. I had to keep the catheter in because I was going back to surgery within 2 days time, so there was no point in taking it out, and that was the most uncomfortable thing ever. The night before my surgery, one of the residents came in and said " I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I'm going to have to shave a little off your scalp for the stickies so we have a better view." So, I sat up and he shaved 4 spots on my head and left. I cried, and it wasn't because I now looked like I was balding, but because it was real again. I was going to wake up and be going back to surgery. Sure enough, the next day ( 26th, now), it was happening again. The second time around, for me, was the harder. It was just the fear of doing it again.  I just kept telling myself " I'm going to go to sleep and wake up". 

That's what I did. I went to sleep and woke up to the same thing. The CAT Scan room, this time they put me on a backboard and all I could do was apologizes for being of the larger girth than most. Most of the people shushed me and I just went back to sleep.  

I was in the hospital for a week. My shoulder hurt but my nose wasn't that bad. Tender, but not as bad as I thought it was. Dr. Aldrich saw me, and told me they got it all but a tiny sliver back next to an artery. He said it would of been more risky to get it than it was to just leave it and let radiation take care of it.  The fact of the matter was I was alive, and most of the tumor was out. And  I was happy with that. 

I was blessed with a good staff, both in the OR and out. I didn't really have a nurse or caregiver that I didn't like or love. My girlfriend was able to stay by my side nearly the entire time and I even had 4 friends visit me, and they spolied me with cards, a shirt, balloons and a little hand made sloth doll. But, I was just delighted to see them. I even showed for them, which I'm sure if they had known, they would of thanked me. Because.. I was smelling like a hospital! 

When I was finally released, I came home to my mom, kid, girlfriend and aunt. My Aunt came into town to help take care of my kid and myself while  was down. She spoiled me rotten as she normally does, and I had such a good time visiting with her. 

Fast Forward till now. 

I'm okay. My smell/taste is back to normal. My nose, though still tender, is no where like it was annnnd my shoulder doesn't hurt anymore! I Just saw the man who discovered the tumor ( who I cannot thank enough, he basically saved my life) and had a check up with him. He is beyond pleased with how I am doing, my eyesight is 100% again, annnnnnd he even did some magic tricks for us. :D Dr. Kelman is a blessing and the most wonderful man I have ever met in the medical field. I love him to bits and hate that I may not see him for a long long time. 

Dr. Kelman doing magic for my kid, and blowing my mom's mind in the background.,

Thank you to the man who saved my life. 

Today I saw the radiologist and talked to him about going to Philly for my Proton Treatment. I'm off work until August, which is stressful. But needed. 

But, we will talk more about that later. 

So, in conclusion. 

So Long Larry. 

Ps. 

I'm winning.